This summer, my three girls and I got toe rings. I know, it’s not really that radical, but it was fun. We picked them out together and showed them off wearing cute sandals. It became exciting when others expressed their surprise that we would do such a thing. I know, such rebels. I wonder what they would have said if we’d gotten tattoos or piercings? Maybe next year…
Summer is over now, even here in the South. My girls have already taken off their rings, but I still have mine on, though I haven’t worn sandals for several weeks. I just can’t bring myself to take it off yet. I know it’s just a silly toe ring, but I find that I’m not ready to part with it.
You see, our kids are growing up. That’s what they do. Soon they will be moving out, going to separate colleges, and only coming home for holidays and the occasional visit. That’s how it should be. They are starting a new phase of their lives by joining their older sister in becoming adults. I’m proud of the people they’ve become and am excited for the adventures that await them.
But I’m also sad.
I know I will always be their mom and we will have fun, special times together in the future, but it will be different. I will no longer be a part of their day to day lives. Deep thoughts and feelings will be shared with close friends and new loves. Fun new adventures, like new toe rings, will be experienced without me. That’s as it should be; it’s their turn to create their own stories.
Knowing, doesn’t make it easy. I’m being challenged in new ways as a mom; I’m learning to let go. Some days I do okay. Other days I find myself reminiscing and grieving. So I keep the toe ring on because I’m not quite ready to say good bye…
